Have you ever heard someone trying to justify doing something that is clearly not what God would want them to? There are times that we think we are doing what God wants but in reality we are doing just the opposite. I noticed something, reading about the crucifixion, that I had never zeroed in on before, that shows this exact thing happening.
John 18:15-17 says, "Simon Peter and another disciple were following Jesus. Because this disciple was known to the high priest, he went with Jesus into the high priest's courtyard, but Peter had to wait outside at the door. The other disciple, who was known to the high priest, came back, spoke to the girl on duty there and brought Peter in. 'You are not one of the disciples, are you?' the girl at the door ask Peter. He replied, 'I am not." Peter went on to deny that he knew Jesus two other times that night.
What I had not thought of before was that Peter denied knowing Christ because he wanted in the courtyard, where Jesus was, and was only let in because John was inside. John asked the girl at the gate to let Peter in. Before she allowed him in, she wanted to know if he was a disciple of Christ. This is Peter's first denial.
Here is my question: Would Peter have been let in had he admitted that he was a disciple? My answer would be 'no.' I don't think that Peter would have been let in had he admitted he was a disciple; and clearly Peter thought the same thing. Once he was into the courtyard, he was asked two other times if he was a disciple. My thought is that Peter thought that if he had said he was a disciple that he would have been thrown out of the courtyard. This explains a lot about Peter's motives.
Preachers often point to the fact that just hours before, Peter was willing to fight for Christ - cutting off a guard's ear. Why would Peter, being this willing to fight, all of the sudden deny he even knew Christ. I think that Peter thought he was doing what Christ would have wanted him to do - to stay with him. Peter denied Christ not out of fear but rather out of love. At the time, Peter wanted to be close to Christ but if he admitted he was a disciple, Peter would have been thrown out of the courtyard. Peter thought he was doing what God wanted but in reality it was just the opposite.
People today are the same way - many are those within the church. People within the church are great at justifying their actions by saying they 'prayed about it and this is what God wants' or saying 'God told me this is what he wants.' I am sure Peter could have said those same things.
Don't get me wrong, when we pray God does give direction and I believe he still speaks to us; however, his guidance would be clear and would not cause wrong doing. Here are some things to think about when someone tells you they are doing what God wants them to.
1. Is there secrecy? If so, it probably is not from God. God's will usually requires no secrets.
2. Are there ulterior motives? If so, it probably is not from God. God's will is pure.
3. Does the action mean a sin would occur? If so, it is definitely not from God. God would never ask us to do something that would cause us, or others, to sin.
I have a new insight into Peter's motive for denying Christ. It wasn't that Peter was afraid (although he might have been), it wasn't that Peter didn't love Jesus, and it wasn't that Peter was a bad friend. I believe that Peter's motives were good (to be near Jesus) but his actions were not. Peter did realize this - after the rooster crowed. He realized that even though his motives were good his actions were not. We need to remember this also; even though our motives might be good, if our actions are not, we are not doing what God wants us to.
